Before you try to fix your long-distance relationship, ask yourself if it’s worth it. Sometimes, a long-distance relationship doesn’t work, and it can be time to let it go.
If you decide to make it work, here’s how you can fix your long-distance relationship:
- Figure out what isn’t working in your long-distance relationship.
- Write down your thoughts and feelings on different aspects of your relationship.
- Share your feelings, thoughts, and concerns with your long-distance partner.
- Allow your partner the time to reflect on what you said.
- Take time to listen to your partner’s feelings, thoughts, doubts, and concerns.
- Discuss your issues with your long-distance partner.
- Together with your partner, you can find a solution that works for both of you and your relationship.
Long-distance brings a lot of uncertainties and confusion into a relationship. Because of this, problems are likely to arise, so you need to learn how to handle them. Having a strategy to resolve problems will help you maintain trust and connection in your long-distance relationship.
Today, we’ll talk about common problems couples face in a long-distance relationship and how to fix them.
How to Solve a Problem in a Long-Distance Relationship?
You can solve most problems in a long-distance relationship through understanding and effective communication.
Depending on the problem, you may decide to continue with your relationship and fix the problem or end your relationship altogether. Ending a relationship is just another way of solving a problem.
For example, suppose your feelings have changed, and you have drifted apart from your partner. In that case, there is little point continuing this romantic relationship. You can always remain, friends, if you trust each other and want to have each other in your lives.
However, suppose you are not having romantic feelings or regular physical intimacy. In that case, you might be better off finding someone else with whom you can be together.
How to Fix Communication Problems in a Long-Distance Relationship?
The most common communication problems in a long-distance relationship are:
- Excessive communication
- Lack of communication
- Confusion and misunderstanding
Excessive communication can lead to boring conversations and take time away from living your life.
A lack of communication can be a sign that either you or your partner are losing interest in each other or your long-distance relationship.
Confusion and misunderstanding can lead to unnecessary arguments and fights that can ruin your relationship.
Here are some things you can do to maintain healthy communication in your long-distance relationship:
- Agree with your long-distance partner on the best way for both of you to communicate. Some people prefer texting, while others prefer video calls. Figure out what works for each of you and find a way to accommodate each other.
- Arrange the best days and times for you to talk to each other, particularly if there is a significant time difference between you.
- Try to keep your conversations exciting and informative. Avoid boring conversations that will make your relationship dull over time.
- When you are communicating online, make sure you express yourselves clearly.
- When you send messages, use complete sentences and correct grammar to avoid unnecessary confusion.
- Keep meaningful conversations to video calls and to when you visit each other to avoid misunderstandings that can become an issue, especially when you’re feeling emotional.
- Send your partner casual and random messages to say that you are thinking of them, love them and appreciate having them in your life.
As you can see, there are many things you can do to avoid communication problems. However, like in any relationship, sooner or later you’re bound to face some problems in your relationship. Unaddressed problems, that last for a long time will fester and ruin your relationship.
To preserve harmony in your long-distance relationship, you should try to fix your communication problems as soon as they arise. Use the tips above to keep track of your communication and keep it healthy.
If you start having communication problems in your long-distance relationship here’s how you can fix them:
- Write down what aspect of your communication is bothering you.
- Express your thoughts and feelings about this problem to your long-distance partner.
- Give your partner some time to reflect on what you’re saying. A day or so should be enough to process what you shared and for them to identify their feelings about this problem.
- Hear out what your partner has to say about your communication.
- If it’s a common problem, you can discuss it and come up with a solution together.
- If it’s a problem that is an issue only for you, your partner can still be accommodating to help you resolve it.
Communication problems can be hard to fix because if you had good communication, you wouldn’t have these problems to begin with. This is one of those occasions where an external help can go a long way in getting your relationship back on track. An easy place to start is this workbook that covers all you need to improve your communication:
How to Fix a Boring Long-Distance Relationship?
When your long-distance relationship becomes boring, first of all, you need to understand why.
Excessive communication leads to boring conversations where you have nothing to talk about. But it is something you can easily fix.
All you need to do is to reduce the amount of time you spend talking to each other. Instead, spend more time with the people around you. A long-distance relationship allows you an opportunity to pursue your own life goals and ambitions.
You have the time to do fun things and have exciting experiences in your everyday life. When you do, you can share something interesting with your long-distance partner next time you talk.
Another way to bring fun into your relationship is by planning a spontaneous surprise trip together.
You can always send an interesting or meaningful gift to your partner to give them something tangible to remember you by.
There are many gadgets on the market to spice up your sex life online. While they don’t replace physical intimacy, they can bring you sexual satisfaction during the times when you are apart.
How to Fix Trust Issues in a Long-Distance Relationship?
Trust is the foundation for a healthy long-distance relationship. However, with many uncertainties, the distance brings into the relationship, partners are prone to having doubts.
Unexpressed doubts can turn into jealousy and controlling behaviour, which can ruin your relationship.
When you’re away from your romantic partner for weeks at a time, you may find yourself worrying about what they do and who they are with. Your insecurities, together with the uncertainties of a long-distance relationship, will make you fear that your long-distance partner is cheating on you.
When you start having mistrust in your relationship, these feelings can influence your behaviour. You can become distrusting and controlling towards your long-distance partner. Doing so will push your partner away and could ruin your relationship.
Understandably, you might be worried that your partner is interested in someone else or perhaps their feelings towards you have changed. The moment these doubts are in your mind, you will start looking for signs to prove you are right.
For example, you may feel that your partner is no longer spending as much time talking to you. While it can be a sign that they lost interest, it’s also possible that they are just busy. The only way to deal with your doubt is to talk to your partner and get your facts straight.
Unresolved trust issues can bring a lot of suffering and may destroy your relationship. To maintain harmony and a healthy relationship, you should fix your trust issues if they become a problem.
Here is how to fix trust issues in a long-distance relationship:
- Recognise the concerns you may have regarding trust in your relationship.
- Try to understand if they come from your doubts and insecurities or something tangible like a change in your partner’s behaviour.
- Talk to your partner about things that bother you, and ask them if there are trust issues or if it’s more of a worry in your mind.
- Talking to your partner will give you the reassurance that everything is alright and you have nothing to worry about.
- You may also find that your concerns have ground and that there are indeed deeper problems in your relationship.
- Take a few days away from your relationship to process your feelings. Think about your findings regarding your partner and your relationship.
- After a few days talk to your partner and together you can decide whether you want to fix these problems or maybe it’s time to end your relationship.
How to Fix a Long-Distance Relationship After Cheating?
Without addressing these issues, you might be tempted to sleep with someone else. While sleeping with someone else, it’s only half of the problem, lying about it, is the thing that ruins trust and destroys the relationship.
When you are in a long-distance relationship, it helps to be honest about your feelings and frustrations with your partner. If you don’t share what’s on your mind, your partner won’t be able to help you.
Once you can express your feelings and needs clearly to your long-distance partner, they will be able to help you find a solution that works for both of you.
If you desperately need sexual satisfaction, it’s understandable that you might slip up and have a sexual encounter with someone else. However, if this happens, you should discuss it with your partner straight away. If it’s a matter of sexual needs, you can try to fix it by seeing each other more frequently or moving in together.
But, if cheating is repetitive and you aren’t able to fix it, then this relationship is toxic for both of you, and you might be better off breaking up.
How to Fix a Long-Distance Relationship After a Fight?
Many fights in long-distance relationships come from misunderstanding. If you keep fighting, try to work on your communication. To have a healthy relationship, you don’t need to fight. What you need is to learn to express yourself clearly and listen to your long-distance partner without judging them.
How to Fix a Toxic Long-Distance Relationship?
If you find yourself in a toxic long-distance relationship, take some time to reassess if it’s worth continuing. Relationships should bring people joy and happiness. When they turn into something full of struggle and frustrations, you have two options. If you still care for each other, you can try and fix the problems. However, if your feelings have changed and you drifted apart, you should move on.
How Do You Fix a Relationship That’s Drifting Apart?
When you’re away from your long-distance partner for a couple of weeks, you can catch up where you left off. However, when it lasts for months, your feelings may change, and you could start drifting apart.
If you want to have a romantic relationship, you should live together or at least plan for it. When you’re starting a long-distance relationship online, you can spend a few months getting to know each other. If you’re looking for a serious relationship, you need a plan and a timeline for moving in together.
If you don’t have a plan for moving in together, your long-distance relationship won’t have an end date. A long-distance relationship without an end it can last a long time. But long-distance relationships aren’t meant to last for more than a few months.
If you are in a relationship without sexual intimacy, then your relationship is more of a friendship than a romantic relationship.
Some couples try to make their long-distance relationship lasts a long time, even if it’s not bringing them joy and fulfilment. If this happens, you should reassess your long-distance relationship to see if it’s worth staying in it.
For a healthy long-distance relationship, you need effective communication to keep emotionally connected and regularly visit each other to maintain physical intimacy. If you don’t have effective communication or are unable to visit each other regularly, after some time, you will start drifting apart. So, if your long-distance relationship lasts a long time or indefinitely, sooner or later, your feelings will change.
When you start drifting apart, you can reassess your long-distance relationship. You may discover that the distance is getting in the way of your relationship, so you may decide to move in together. Once you’ve drifted apart and your romantic feelings are no longer there, it can be time to end your relationship and move on.
Long-distance relationships have a lot of benefits and can be great fun. However, for couples that want to be together but can’t, long-distance relationships become a struggle.
There are many things you can do to avoid problems in a long-distance relationship. For example, effective communication can help you maintain an emotional connection. Frequent visits and spontaneous trips together can help you maintain physical intimacy.
However, having problems now and then is inevitable and it’s normal. As long as you know what to do with problems and have a strategy to deal with them, you’ll be able to fix them.
When you face a problem, acknowledge what is causing it. Discuss it with your partner, and together, find a solution that works for both of you.
Frequently Asked Questions
How can I fix my long-distance relationship?
You can fix your long-distance relationship by discussing the problems with your partner. After considering all possible solutions, you may decide to find something that can fix your relationship. However, you may also find that things have changed and your long-distance relationship has come to an end. If this happens, discuss it with your partner all the same. You don’t need to break up with lots of hate and arguments. There might be a way where you can remain friends and be there for each other in time of need.
How to fix a long-distance relationship breakup?
Once you decide to break up, you should probably move on with your life. Clinging to something that is no longer there will do more harm than good. Why spend time suffering in a relationship that ended? It could be more fun to create an exciting relationship with an interesting person.
How do you fix a long-distance relationship after a fight?
After you fought for a long-distance relationship, take a few days or a week away from the relationship. A bit of space will help you and your partner reflect on your relationship and on the problems you may have. It will also give you a chance to calm down and look at your relationship more rationally. Sometimes overwhelming emotions can blind us from seeing what’s right in front of us. Having a different perspective can open your eyes to some of the solutions and how you can fix your relationship problems.
How do you fix a struggling long-distance relationship?
If you’re struggling in a long-distance relationship, ask yourself if your relationship is worth it. When you start a relationship with someone, you expect it to bring joy and fulfilment into your life. Every relationship has problems. But, if all you have in your relationship is a struggle, you might be better off moving on. Some problems are easy to fix. But sometimes the best thing you can do is to end the relationship that isn’t working and create a more healthy one with someone else.
How do you fix a long-distance relationship that’s falling apart?
If you feel that your long-distance relationship is falling apart, trie to find out why. Identify the problems that are causing dysfunction in your relationship. Once you know what’s not working, you can talk about it with your long-distance partner and find a solution for it. If you can change your circumstances, then do it. If you’re not in a position to change things, consider a different form of relationship or breaking up.
Can you fix a long-distance relationship break up?
After you’ve broken up, in most cases, you should probably move on. Being stuck in a relationship that has ended is a bit silly. Understandably, it isn’t easy because you are used to having someone special in your life. But you don’t have to say goodbye. If you are getting on well together but can’t be physically close, you can consider remaining friends.
How to fix problems in a long-distance relationship?
To fix problems in a long-distance relationship, you need to know what these problems are. Once you identify the problems, see if they are worth fixing. As long as you and your partner have a willingness to fix problems in your relationship, you can try to do so. However, if your feelings have changed and you drifted apart, perhaps it’s time to move on from your relationship altogether.
HOW CAN COUPLES COACHING HELP YOU
1. Subscribe to our Newsletter
Receive Tips & Advice on how you can improve your relationship.
2. Read our Blog
Learn all there is to know about relationships and how to make them work. Here you can find helpful articles for every aspect of your relationship.
Get in touch to see how we can help!
3. Buy a Workbook
Check out our selection and choose the most relevant workbook for your relationship.
4. Book a Coaching Session
If you help right now…
If you have a burning issue…
If you are facing an important decision…
If you are lost and unsure about your relationship…